This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
