I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
