it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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