Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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