I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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