Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(651): View more from Minnesota

the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.

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(763): View more from Minnesota

I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me

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(703): View more from Virginia

He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'

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(303): View more from Colorado

it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.

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(425): View more from Washington

Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?

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(925): View more from California

All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?

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