dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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