recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
