I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
