I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
