Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Randomize
