its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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