i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Randomize