We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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