btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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