Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(541): View more from Oregon

I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??

Fav 8 872 2607
share tweet
(407): View more from Florida

is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?

Fav 30 987 9634
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(303): View more from Colorado

I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.

(720): View more from Colorado

Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.

(303): View more from Colorado

But what if I pay for the gas?

Fav 53 1499 7401
share tweet
(360): View more from Washington

Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.

Fav 7 3514 1233
share tweet
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(450): View more from Quebec

I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life

Fav 7 4437 1408
share tweet
(770): View more from Georgia

There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.

Fav 9 4240 1117
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(217): View more from Illinois

We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.

Fav 4 1869 877
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(710): View more from

my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am

Fav 3 949 484
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(551): View more from New Jersey

and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge

Fav 1 29 28
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT