I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Randomize
