all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.