The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
