dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
