Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
