I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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