On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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