cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
