she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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