did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
