:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
