Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Randomize
