I feel like I'm in dance class right now
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize