somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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