I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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