I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
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You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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