First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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