I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
did you just send me my own nude
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize