IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
Randomize
