Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Randomize
