He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Randomize
