the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
3 2 1 whiskey
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Your penis caused this!
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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