Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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