Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize