Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
