If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?