oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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