Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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