if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
