hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
