I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize