Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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