I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
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