love makes seman taste better
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him