We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
