Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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